you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
