she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I deserve this hangover.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
