i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
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