4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
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