i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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