I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
