"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I just blew my weed a kiss
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
