No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
