"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
