I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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