I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
