who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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