She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Im part way to drunk.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Randomize