I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
