Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.

(1-973): View more from New Jersey

Guess she heard her killer coming

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(606): View more from Kentucky

There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

Sacagawea was the original milf.

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(214): View more from Texas

didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.

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(314): View more from Missouri

the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.

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(914): View more from New York

He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?

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(417): View more from Missouri

I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...

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(208): View more from Idaho

I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.

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