You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
