Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Only a mothe r could love this liver
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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