Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
