Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
