can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
