Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
