It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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