Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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