god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Randomize
