on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
