apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
