Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize
