Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
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