Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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