Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
