i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Randomize