I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
