soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
