I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
This house was built for laser tag.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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