she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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