Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Randomize
