Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
