So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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