He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Someone stole a lamp last night.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
