New invention idea: vibrating tampons
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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