have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize