You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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