I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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