so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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