Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
