did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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