This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
