You really coming over, don't trick.
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
hell yes lets make some ravioli
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
