Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
