sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize