i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
only you would photoshop your dick
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
