Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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